A firestorm was unleashed on the internet when it was reported that Daniel Craig had pressed movie heads to include a gay scene in his next Bond film. “Why not?” he said, “Dr Who has gay scenes and no one blinks an eye!” But the world’s most infamous misogynist womaniser buckling down for a bit of same-sex shagging? While the idea horrified some die-hard fans, others, still moist about Craig’s revelatory swimsuit in Casino Royale were foaming about the idea of a full frontal. And he’s only too happy to please fans - female or male. Remember his boy-kiss in Infamous?

So while Craig continues to hunt down a Brokeback Oscar, the problem remains: James Bond doesn’t need a gay story line. Why? Been there, done that, got the tuxedo. Bond has, without question, been the longest running, fag-friendly spy-story in cinema history. Have you ever known Jason Bourne to order a martini, shaken or stirred, while fending off a super-villain dressed in a dress? Quite. Here are eight more examples that reveal how queer-friendly Bond already is.

Bond Themes

Gay, gay, gay. Excluding the second Casino Royale (by Audioslave‘s über-macho Chris Cornell), there’s a long history of gay icons linked to Bond themes. With the exception of Cher and Kylie, any icon worth her heels has done Bond. Madonna, Lulu, Sheena Easton, Tina Turner, Sheryl Crowe and Duran Duran have all tied one on. Even Tom Jones and Burt Bacharach at a pinch. Shirley Bassey (pictured) was so popular, she came back again. And again!

Lesbians

James Bond’s father Ian Fleming had a thing about women, which probably accounts for all the lesbians in need of taming by his alter ego. Women like Irma Bunt whose name gave it away in On Her Majesty’s Secret Service. Or From Russia With Love’s dykey Rosa Kleb. Goldfinger turned on the plot of a vengeful lesbian whose sister died after a golden paint job. Naturally Bond beds them all.
 
Pussy Galore

The most famous lesbian was Goldfinger’s Pussy Galore. Here was a long, leggy woman who got her name from the number of women in her Flying Circus, a team of Sapphic aviatrixes. It’s said Monty Python lifted the title to a chorus of “no poofters!” Obviously Bond tried to convert the high-flyer.  “What would it take for you to see things my way?” he enquired. “A lot more than you’ve got,” replied Pussy.

More Pussy

Who says drag queens aren’t evil? It took five films to kill the villainously effete Blofeld, a man so preoccupied with stroking his Persian pussy that he turns to cross-dressing to double-cross Bond while delivering a stack of witty one-liners with consummate skill. It worked, but at a cost. Blofeld’s evil empire SPECTRE collapsed soon after ‘the frock’ incident.

Kidd and Wynt

Diamonds Are Forever was a riot of queerness. Blofeld was back, his devilish henchmen Mr Kidd and Mr Wint were stalking Bond and a woman called Plenty O’Toole (uh huh). Lifted from Hitchcock’s Rope, the creepy, camp couple were let loose with a box of fiendish toys to cause deathly mayhem wherever they could: scorpions a speciality. They did so holding hands, which was kinda sweet really.

Roger Moore

Camp, camp, camp – a super-spy called Roger Moore? Yet he was one of the most successful, an agent whose greatest service to her Majesty involved a woman who looked like a man, and a man with a penchant for silk pyjamas. As May Day in A View To A Kill Grace Jones was a frighteningly aesthetic, double-crossed dominatrix assassin who died saving Silicon Valley and the future of computing (remember that next time Windows crashes). It was that or go back to bed with Christopher Walken. Or Bond. By this time, Moore was 58 going on 70 and his romantic antics were scaring children.
 
Mankini

Ah, the under-rated mini-mankini. While sipping cocktails with Jill St John, Sean Connery sported a peculiar swimming costume. It was certainly an odd job, but if anyone could make a terry-towelling one-piece alluring, it was Bond. The framing of his famously sexy chest helped though it must be noted that the mankini never really caught on. Just ask Borat.

Nipples

Not technically gay yet certainly a spike of manly interest was Bond’s preoccupation with arch-villain Francisco Scaramanga’s third nipple. There was a touch of Austin Power’s ‘mole’ fixation about The Man With The Golden Gun, a troublesome agent who died, ironically, when Bond shot him in the heart, presumably using that pesky extra nipple as a target.

Naturally the last word goes to a typically boastful Bond. Refuting his approaches, a now demure Rosa Klebb claims that she’s not pretty enough - her mouth is too big. “But it’s just the right size,” he says, “for me…”

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