Wet, wet, wet
| Wet, wet, wet |
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Songs and spankings come together in one of the bawdiest shows this Mardi Gras, writes Katrina Fox. When singer-songwriter John Woods met spoken-word artist, sex columnist and sex shop manager Cass King in their home country Canada, it was a match made in heaven. “Cass and I met when we were double-booked to perform at a poetry/experimental music open mic night,” Woods says. “I wound up backing up Cass on electric sitar while she read her lesbian erotic poetry. I thought she was this amazing, hot person but that she was only interested in women. Then she read a poem about making out with men and women, so I thought we might have something in common after all.” After dating for a year, the two of them began collaborating on artistic projects and launched themselves as the Wet Spots. Essentially an “old-fashioned song and dance duo”, Woods and King (who are both bisexual) sing songs about… well, sex. ‘Smack My Bottom’ and ‘Fist Me This Christmas’ are among their saucy ditties, and after releasing their music video ‘Do You Take it in the Ass?’ on YouTube, they quickly went from bookings in seedy dives and sex clubs to headlining at comedy clubs across the globe. Their ‘Do You Take it’ song even got airplay in season two of The L Word. “Until then we had just thought of the Wet Spots as an act to amuse our kinky friends. We were shocked to find that people in the ‘straight’ world could find our stuff funny. But it turns out that our audience includes leathermen and soccer moms. Nobody is indifferent when it comes to sex,” says King of their meteoric rise to fame. “Lyrically in songs people tend to talk around sex, or use a double-entendre,” Woods adds. “But in a drinking song you just say outright how plastered you got. So we’re trying to write songs that are witty and well-written and lyrically mature but also do not shy away from saying exactly what they mean, sexually.” So, what ‘research’ do they do for their show? “We try to write about things that people can relate to,” King says. “We have several hysterical ditties about cock and ball torture, but they just don’t play to all audiences. So we try to keep it to the themes that the majority of people will understand. The thing about our kinky material is that we’re singing from the perspective of people who find this behaviour totally normal and acceptable, and we do! We’re writing about things we’ve seen or things we do … like how do you invite your neighbours to an orgy? How do you ask your special sweetie if he or she will spank you?”
Talking of spankings – which are promised in the show – how safe is the audience? “We believe in getting consent from our partners. But we can be quite convincing,” laughs Woods.
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