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It’s not a great time for women’s sexuality. The Sydney Morning Herald recently reported a story on a disturbing US trend that may be making its way to Australia, namely ‘purity balls’.
Girls from university age down to as young as four attend a formal function with their fathers who then make a pledge to keep their daughters ‘pure’. The pledge goes as follows: “I choose before God to cover my daughter as her authority and protection in the area of purity. I will be pure in my own life as a man, husband and father. I will be a man of integrity and accountability as I lead, guide and pray over my daughter and my family as the high priest in my home. This covering will be used by God to influence generations to come.”
Yep, the loony Christians are at it again. Not content with condemning queers, they seek to control girls’ and women’s sexuality. The balls come out of the thriving evangelical communities of Colorado Springs and while the girls do not make a pledge, it’s clear they are expected to comply with abstaining from sex before marriage. And get this quote by organiser Randy Wilson in The New York Times: “They are desperately waiting for us in a culture that lures them into the murky waters of exploitation. They need to be rescued by you, their dad.”
Pass the sick bucket, please! While this program may masquerade as an attempt to build healthy relationships between fathers and their daughters, the sexism is blatantly obvious: girls are inferior beings wholly incapable of making decisions for themselves and whose sexuality must be repressed. I doubt that conversations between father and daughter will include advice to use condoms should the daughter ‘slip’ out from underneath the halo of purity dad tries to smother her in. What if she realises she’s a lesbian? If she stays ‘pure’ until such time as she can marry her girlfriend in Canada or Massachusetts, does that count? Doubt it. What if, driven by hormones, the scent of freedom and a sense of wild abandonment, she decides to model for a menstruation porn site? What will the sight of his once innocent young princess now writhing around in her own period blood, sucking on a tampon freshly pulled from her warm vagina, do to the ‘father-daughter’ bond?
I’m all for girls being given guidance to avoid them being exploited: Encourage them to pose the question, ‘Is a tank top or free hat really enough of a payout for flashing my tits and arse and engaging in sexual behaviour for the makers of Girls Gone Wild who will make millions from immortalising my actions on DVD?’ Give them positive messages about their bodies, about their sexuality. Talk to them about how fabulous condoms are and to be assertive in getting their male partners to wear one. But trying to ensure they remain ‘pure’ is insulting and oppressive.
I am woman, hear me roar. Grrrr!
Katrina Fox
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