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Like its namesake, this new sex toy will have you all lit up. Just ask Barry Lowe.
The greatest sex toy invention since the dildo or Joey Stefano’s butthole? Pretty close.
We’re talking about the Fleshjack (nee Fleshlight). The name stems from the fact that the outer plastic casing (black, white, silver, opaque) resembles an outsize torch (flashlight). But it’s the inner sleeve that is the miracle of man-made ingenuity.
And that made man is former police officer Steve Shubin who was suffering blue balls because of a lack of sex as his wife was undergoing a high-risk pregnancy. Rather than go out and play round, ten years ago he was granted a patent for a “device for discreet sperm collection”.
Yea, well that’s the idea if you want to collect it like stamps or used rubbers but the ‘residue’ does wash away easily or you can … well, use your imagination.
The insert is not plastic or rubber. In fact it’s a secret substance that will be known only to your penis although we’re allowed to reveal that the material is an “elastomeric gel formed from a mixture of 90-94% by weight of plasticising oil and of 5-9% by weight of a block copolymer comprising an admixture of …” Blah blah blah. Look it up if you’re of a scientific bent. And like the modern gay arsehole, it’s suitable only for water-based lubricants.
The inserts come in various shades of human including the decidedly alien ‘ice’, which is stickier internally than the others. The entrances come in (no pun intended) vagina, butthole, mouth, classic Jack ass and stealth (formerly non-descript that looks like a postal slot in a letterbox).
The inserts also come in various widths and ripples to enhance pleasure. The Fleshlight is pretty unrelenting in its heterosexuality, and if you want a cute guy doing things to a Fleshlight check out the US website (www.fleshlight.com ).
But if the Fleshlight is too straight, try the Fleshjack, which was launched in April last year. Yeah, it’s the same old same old except the marketing department realised that gay men are avid consumers of the latest high tech sex toy. There are no women on the Fleshjack website.
And my opinion? Well I had to test it five or six dozen times to ensure my initial reaction was correct. As a confirmed bottom I could turn top for my Fleshjack.
There are a few down points: the lubricant leaks, it’s a bit fiddly to clean, and you can’t squeeze the plastic casing to make it tighter around your dick. But, hey, the Fleshjack doesn’t have to douche and it doesn’t leave those nasty shit stains round your knob.
You can remove the inner layer to squeeze it tighter but then the sperm has nowhere to dribble but out the end. Unless you’re hung like Goliath my tip would be to go for the tightest model. The feeling is akin to getting a blowjob from Polymer Man – but a bloody good blow job. I don’t think I’ve had such intense orgasms in years.
They’re expensive but there’s something incredibly sexy watching a guy insert his hard-on into the inviting pink lips. If you don’t believe me, just look at the website. This could be the beginning of a new wave of jerk-off parties.
fleshjack.com.au/
fleshjack.com/
[www.barrylowe.net ]
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